Dear Elitist Gamer – STFU!

This one is for all the wannabes out there. You know who you are.

If you are one of those gamers who wants to blab about gaming theories and construct elaborate explanations for what makes a fun game and what does not, let me let you in on a little secret:

EVERYONE KNOWS THAT YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT.

Seriously, when a gamer starts quoting bullshit that they read on The Forge as if that somehow means something it drives me nuts. Have you designed a game? Has anybody played it? Do you GM? Do people want to play in your games?

Probably not.

Do yourself a favor and start gaming. Write and design a game. Run that hypothetical adventure that you are so sure would be “perfect” (it won’t be). Stop talking. Start doing.

Because you are going to fail, and that is a good thing.

You are going to fuck it up royally, and that will force you to face the fact that you don’t know jack and shit about what you have been talking about. You are going to have to grow and learn and ditch those misconceptions that you have been dribbling out of that fucking leaky orifice you call a mouth.

So do not share your opinion in a snooty, elitist and preposterous tone if you have not actually done something! Go do something, fail and then feast on that humble pie that you so richly deserve. Then the very next day you will have something worth sharing when you speak about games.

Are you one of the wannabes that I am talking about? Then don’t waste my time with a comment. Everyone else, feel free to leave one.